Marcia's Leadership Q and As: Six Ways to Help a Fearful Boss

Q. Our manager is struggling and lacks the courage needed for making better and faster decisions. What can we do?

A. The uncertain times that many leaders and business owners face now, create more fear. Whether it’s a Board of Directors or team leaders, more people are avoiding discussions they need to have and tough decisions they need to make. If management sidesteps being accountable, employees see the lack of courage. The workplace becomes full of fear, and it erodes trust and stalls progress. 

If your manager or the business owner seems stuck or paralyzed and incapable of making forward thinking decisions, there are ways the employees can help. Consider several options. 

First, be the natural leader that your manager can’t be at this moment. Demonstrate the courage you want to see. Just step up delicately and respectfully. Take the initiative and talk about the tough issues and what you can all do to handle them. Courage can be contagious. Have positive, forward thinking conversations where you consider pro’s and con’s and various ways you can address them together. 

Second, when an issue or customer problem needs to be addressed, ask thoughtful, non-threatening questions. Use “we” language. “What’s the risk “we” need to consider? How can “we” address this together and move toward success?” United, anyone in the meeting is less threatened with moving forward. 

Third, when your leader is lacking confidence as everyone does at various times, privately talk to them. Sometimes a simple comment like, “These are challenging times, but I want you to know I’m here (Or we, the team) to support you, brainstorm ideas, or back you up.” It’s amazing how quickly their fear can rapidly dissipate when they feel support from others. 

Fourth, in an environment where people generally are collaborative, address the elephant in the room by saying, “It seems like we’re stuck” or “It seems like we’re not addressing our customers’ issues or our business issues with our usual commitment.” Then begin to break down the behaviors. Identify the fears that exist. There may 20 or 40 or 60 (fear of losing the business, fear of change, fear of the unknown, etc.). By naming them, you also diffuse them. The more you communicate, the more you can plan how to address them. Regular discussions about fear can then help you pivot to build more trust. Anticipate what you can do to address various scenarios. Make your tentative plans. When you adopt one plan, you can then modify it together as you learn. 

Fifth, create space and time for people to have hard conversations. Encourage open communication without criticism and judgment. It’s a powerful and healthy habit to experience and institute in any organization.

Sixth, acknowledge that during uncertain times, especially those outside of your control, that you will make decisions. Some will work; some won’t. But you’ll learn from all of them. Share widely what you are learning. Pivot from being stuck in your thinking and actions to being strategic. Help everyone to keep adapting toward the future. 

United the management and the employees can go through tough, uncertain times that are out of their control. But through deliberate conversation together, more creative options can be considered and chosen.